


The letters I got

by Dandelion (yukitsubute)



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: 2018 Stony MCU Bingo, Apologies, Letters, M/M, Post-Civil War (Marvel), Romance, Steve Rogers Feels, Stony Bingo, Tony Being Tony, Tony Stark Feels, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-07
Updated: 2018-07-07
Packaged: 2019-06-06 20:10:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,069
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15202529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yukitsubute/pseuds/Dandelion
Summary: Tony gets letters from Steve, but he only wants one thing: An apology.





	The letters I got

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, this is another small thing for the cap_ironman bingo it’s the bingo prompt: canon: mcu (post-ca: CW) 
> 
> I hope you enjoy reading it. <3

Four letters in two weeks … Tony sighed. He hadn’t replied to a single one, but Steve didn’t give up, and he told him in every letter that he would never give up on him, even though that meant that he needed to send hundreds of letters to him.

Tony had read all of them, and some more than once, but he couldn’t reply. He wanted, but he couldn’t. Steve had avoided to talk about what had happened between them. He told him about trivia, about things Tony was totally not interested, but he was good in reading between the lines. Steve apologized in each sentence, just that he didn’t write it down directly. And that somehow annoyed Tony. He wanted an apology, an honest meant apology.

He placed the letter on the cupboard and took his cup to take a big sip of his coffee. He closed his eyes and enjoyed the warm liquid running down his throat. He had so many thoughts running through his mind, and each and every thought ended with one name: Steve Rogers.

A knock on his door pulled Tony out of his thoughts.

He knew this special knock, because it was firm and strong, yet insecure and kind of afraid. Tony opened the door. 

It was really Steve standing there with another letter in his hands. "You really want to give me a letter?" Tony asked. This could just be a joke. 

 

Steve looked at him. He was nibbling his lower lip, like he always did, when he was nervous about something. This hardly happened, but Tony knew he was the person who could make Steve acting like that. No war, no fight could make Steve freak out, but Tony Stark could. And somehow he enjoyed that.

“I thought you aren’t at home and I can place the letter in the mail box without getting caught,” Steve said.

Tony’s eyes got smaller. “Did you bring all the letters in person?”

Steve nodded. “So I know that you get the letters, and they aren’t lost somewhere else.”

Tony sighed. This was ‘Steve-logic’. Tony wanted to send him away, he really did, but he couldn’t. Somehow Steve looked like a lost puppy, and something in Tony jumped uncomfortably. “Come in,” he finally said.

Steve for sure wanted to apologize, but Tony knew the other, he wouldn’t say it out loud, because he couldn’t. He didn’t know why Steve couldn’t just say it. But this time he wanted to hear it, no, he needed to hear it directly. He wouldn’t accept any present or letter without an honest meant apology. The last issues they had had were minor things and Tony had always accepted a present from Steve as an apology, but this time he had left him suffering, he would have accepted Tony’s death.

If there wouldn’t have been deep feelings from Tony, he would probably have killed Steve already. But he couldn’t change the way his heart had decided. Sometimes he hated his heart for deciding this way, but in the end he had already accepted it. He just insisted on this apology, and maybe he would let the other suffer a little longer, but he already craved for the comfy feeling he always had when he had been with the other.

It was strange, even though he was still angry a good feeling spread in him, just because Steve stood there in his garden, with this stupid letter. He walked to the kitchen and turned. Steve stood not far away from him, looking lost and embarrassed. “Coffee?” Tony asked.

Steve nodded at him. “Thank you,” he said when Tony handed him a cup.

“So, you send me letter over letter and how do you think this should go on?” Tony asked directly. He didn’t want to talk about unnecessary things and get directly to the point.

“I don’t know.” Steve looked down at his cup. For some moments he didn’t say anything. Tony’s stomach twitched. Not even now he was able to say something? That couldn’t be. Right in the moment he wanted to say something, Steve suddenly looked up. “Can you imagine that everything gets back to normal between us one day?”

Again this wasn’t an apology. “No.” Tony shook his head. He could see Steve’s colour fading from his face and his shoulder hung down desperately. “As long as there isn’t an apology from you, I won’t agree to get back to normal.”

“But I apologised in every letter,” Steve replied.

It was like Tony had imagined it. Steve thought that all the between the lines apologies would be enough. He rolled his eyes. “No, you talked about a lot of unimportant things, but there was never a line saying ‘I am sorry’.”

Steve opened his mouth, but closed it again to lick over his lips nervously. Tony couldn’t understand why the other had such problems with a simple apology. “Why the hell can’t you say that you are sorry?” Tony burst out.

Steve shifted nervously. “I …,” he sighed. “I fear that you don’t accept my apology, and as long as I don’t apologize directly, I can keep up with the hope that you would react to my hidden apologies one day.” He now looked directly at Tony. “But if I apologize and you reject it I don’t know what to do.”

Steve-logic…Tony rubbed his face. “I will never ever understand your brain, Cap.”

Steve’s lips tugged into a short smile before he got earnest again. “I am deeply sorry, Tony.”

Why didn’t he say that earlier? Was it really that hard to say it out loud. “And what do you think happens now?” Tony wanted to know.

“I hope that you don’t send me away immediately and that you at least give me the chance to make up for what I did to you.”

Tony’s heart jumped. It was against all rational thoughts, and he really should have send him away, but he couldn’t. “Don’t believe that I will let you stay overnight, because I won’t.” He pointed at Steve. “And for today I need to be alone, but I would appreciate a call from you.” He stepped closer. “And stop with all these letters already.”

Steve’s face turned into a smile. “I will.”

“Good.” Tony nodded. It would take them some time to get back to normal, but positive emotions started dancing through Tony’s body. They’d make it.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. 
> 
>  
> 
> Comments and kudos are loved. 
> 
> I am not a native :)


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